Blink

I decided to take a one book break from the Small Group ministry books I've read of late. I picked up Malcolm Gladwell's Blink: the Power of Thinking without Thinking. Gladwell authored the wildly successful The Tipping Point.





Blink is a good book filled with Gladwell's argument and then a lot of anecdotal stories to illustrate his points. He further seasons the work with some psychological and behavioral research.





The basic argument is that in complex decisions, more information leads us to make poor choices, if we can make any choice at all. Go with the gut and act seems to be the maxim. He frames this by acknowledging that we do need to think through some decisions, those decisions are more likely to be of a simpler nature. We have access to so much information in this age that the additional data doesn't serve us well--we can't process it and it is often contradictory in nature. Rather than lead us to informed decisions, we end up informed but in stasis--information overload in other words.





For my own part, my gut is usually right about things, though often I make experience prove that intuition. One drawback to this approach is that we can't answer 'why' when we follow our gut. Gladwell admits this but argues that we don't usually know why when use something other than our gut. He argues that, while we can't control our first instinct, to better utilize our gift for instant preferences, we should provide better parameters and avoid stereotypes or cultural biases.





Easier said than done. If you are looking for an interesting and easy, but not life altering read, this book is for you.

book reviews

I'm a big fan of The Wire tv series, a 5 season offering from HBO. I didn't have HBO when it came out; I still don't. But I did view the series via DVDs.



Before you run out to grab it, there is violence and language and adult content. I didn't find any of it gratuitous, but others might. Be forewarned.



The series takes on urban life from a multitude of perspectives using Baltimore's police, politics, news media, poverty and education system as foils. I really found it to be a good representation of the life in Trenton, albeit the series did so on a larger and grander stage.



To that end, I picked up a book by The Wire's creator, David Simon, titled Homicide. Simon was a reporter for the Baltimore Sun until buyouts and cutbacks led him to scriptwriting. Homicide is a non-fictional account of a year in the Baltimore Police Department's homicide unit. It's a fascinating account about investigation and its separation from prosecution as well as ample "inside baseball" material. It's not a quick read but I recommend it.



I also read Rafael Alvarez's The Wire: Truth Be Told which chronicles the series from inception to finale. It includes episode summaries as well as essays about peripheral topics. The material from Simon was by far the most interesting for me.

thanks

There are many things to give thanks for. Calvary Baptist and its community is certainly one. I also give thanks for the quote I heard last week:

"[Calvary Baptist Church] is like Disney World, except with Jesus instead of Mickey Mouse."--Sarah Stoner.

Great quote. I'll try to post notable quotables as they arise.


My reading on Life Groups continues. Here are some notes for a very insightful book about LGs:

Making Small Groups Work; Henry Cloud & John Townsend

Need a theological and practical vision for small groups [SGs].

For Leaders

SGs foster reconciliation. Leaders can help members: reconnect to the Source, reconnect through real relationships, experience total grace, learn & experience the value of obedience to God and give control to God.

To achieve this, SGs need grace, truth and time. Time is not real time but redemptive time. Group time has seasons.

Groups

Groups provide connectedness, integration of character, honesty, normalize struggle.

There is discipline and structure to SGs. To discipline, see the love in discipline, see the need, learn a language of discipline, and learn how much structure the group needs.

Decide prayer’s place in the group. Pray about group issues. Encourage individual accountability. Forgiveness is an element—forgiveness for the group and from the group.

Mentoring is a necessary ingredient to build new leadership.

Starting one

There are two threads to groups: structure/truth (how group imparts its truth to its members) or experience/process (how much emotional closeness is right for the group). Good groups need some of both threads.

Typical types: bible/book study, topical, recovery and general support. In choosing materials, people come first. Prepared group members have a much better exp.

Groups facilitate process, provide safety, listen, clarify and ask questions, confront, set limits, allow and silence.

Group members

Expectations for group members: be known, listen to each other, receive and give feedback, learn to love, practice obedience, make positive changes, learn new skills, discover and develop gifts, discern harmful patterns, confess and repent, take risks, and grieve.

There will be problems in groups. Expect that. There are ways to deal with neediness, noncompliance, passivity, shutting someone up, aggression, narcissism, and spiritualization.

Life Groups

Some church matters over the past few months have kept me from focusing on Life Groups. I don't have a very good LG background. But I'm trying to catch up quickly through voracious reading.

Find below some notes from a book I just finished entitled The Seven Deadly Sins of Small Group Ministry by Donahue and Robinson.

The Seven Deadly Sins are:

Unclear Ministry objectives: Three small group models: church w/groups; church of groups; church is groups. P22. Ways to associate groups: affinity, geography, placement. How to belong: church member, prospective, seeker. Every group has a leader. Some meetings have instituted structure model, others are per the group. Curriculum can be centralized or per the group. Willow has low-control, high-monitor model. Vertical alignment links w/church mission; horizontal alignment builds church together.

Lack of Point Leadership: Need someone to champion small group min to leadership and to church. Get people connected; monitor group effectiveness. Point leader needs leadership, administrative gifts, discernment, ability to communicate vision, team building.

Poor Coaching Structures: Good coaches care, listen, encourage, pray and reproduce (Christ in others through spiritual development). Coaches need supervision of the same kind.

Neglect of Ongoing Leadership Development: Pay attention to leadership pipeline and develop those leaders in it.

Closed Group Mind-Set: Open chair matters. Teach community with it growing and enlarging on different levels.

Narrow Definition of a Small Group: Define role of leader, nature of connection, community of care, spiritual next steps, willingness to extend community. Have common developmental framework, common structure, and common ground.

Neglect of the Assimilation Process: Follow up early and often. Also know when to quit. Connect to a small group leader. Developmental framework is: Groups, Grace, Growth, Gifts and Good Stewardship.

Book reviews return!

I must be pretty famous. Or I’m very forgetful. Over the past two months, I’ve gotten innumerable emails seeking my help in assisting foreigners navigate bureaucracy as they seek to reclaim their fortunes. And they all claim to have met me and gotten my implicit agreement for assistance. WOW!

I’m bringing back a golden oldie. When I served on Trenton’s City Council I had a daily blog. Among the blog components were some book reviews. Most of these dealt with urban policy—crime intervention, housing, economic development, community organizing, etc. It was interesting stuff and very pertinent at the time. The reading continues, though the subject for the most part has changed.

Let’s start with a book review of…When Helping Hurts: How to Alleviate Poverty without Hurting the Poor and Yourself by Steve Corbett & Brian Fikkert. I read this book upon a recommendation this summer and Calvary recently concluded a study of this book as a Sunday School elective and as a Wednesday night offering. The authors argue that most Christian efforts to help those in need are counter-productive and discourage meaningful personal relationships. Most Christian social ministry is geared to relief when more appropriate models of assistance (rehabilitation and development) are needed. Relief as a model promotes dependency on those receiving and an air of superiority on the part of the giver. Long term resentment and “savior complexes” can arise.

This tendency hurts both parties. The recipients lose dignity and opportunities for responsibility. The situation encourages false pride and self-sufficiency on the part of the givers. This cycle reinforces itself and creates a nasty cyclone.

The author provides a great story to illustrate this at the beginning of the book. Everything about the story screams for his intervention, and he does intervene. He goes on to show that his intervention, while providing some relief, had short and long-term consequences and, as importantly, negated an opportunity of the community to take care of itself. It was easy to intervene; it felt like the emotionally acceptable thing to do; it was harmful to the community and to him.

The authors argue that care and compassion and love require more than a quick fix (which isn’t a fix at all). It requires relationships that show the vulnerability and brokenness of all parties and thereby allows Christ to transform.

I recommend the book highly and it has had a great impact on Calvary’s missiology as we move forward. We are getting out of the relief business and focusing all our missional efforts on relationship building.